UPCOMING RUNS IN BEIJING
Do not miss any single run of the Beijing HHH, Fullmoon HHH or Boxer HHH. Find all upcoming runs details here and find you can find any blame THE HARES!
Our next run is…
What is your favourite part of Beijing? Hou-high is beihai? Ask any rando’s you’ve just added on Wechat, Tantan, Momo or Tinder to join you for a spring stroll around Houhai and we bet you a fiver he or she will actually show up. As a non-matter of fact, do ask them to do exactly that on this Saturday, April 14th. We hereby officially declare the Hash Summer hunting season opened and so will meet at 2.30PM for a 3PM run (not a 2PM run).
Ready for some cheap Belgian import? That’s right, expect our 2 guest hashers ‘Big Brussels’ (Moist Brussels’ bruther) and ‘Mama Mussels’ (Moist Brussels’ mum) to reward your sexy hash-flash swim boxers, goggles and Beijing Bikinis more than generously with some pinker Elephant beer. Delirious! Elephantastic! No struggling here, the offer is real.
The theme is Lao BB. Not just because this sexy hash trail is ‘bringing Hutong back’ with a spring vengeance. We know, we say ‘BB’, you think ‘BS’ ( Beijings’ infamous Higher Brothers : dakai Weixin bu shi lai ting ni BB zhe xie de). But ‘B’ and ’B’ represent the longstanding friendship between Lao Beijing and Belgium. Belgium’s massive total national land area is at least twice (twice!) as big as Beijing. Size, hashers?
Also, ‘just Li’ is finally turning 18. Some might even say (fake news?) she has been steadily making a name for herself at the hash. So prepare to get your green Yanjing moist and remember… one swallow does not make a summer. Who said head? We need the hole lot of yous to put on your pair of swim shorts, algae bras and beer goggles to come help us moist her. Cum cum and get together, drink, run, and celebrate this happy (birth)day for all hashers who are Aries.
Last but not least: who’s a good boi? Pickle Rick? Cumply and help us shout ‘ON HOME’ as we dionysusically run through Lao Beijing’s long-kept secret campus gates. On a Friday the 13th hang-over, what could possibly go wrong?
Muscles From Brussels, Big Brussels, Mama Muscle
Saturday April 14
SUMMER HOURS Meet at 2:30 p.m. Run starts at 3 p.m.
Swimming Goggles (glasses), Swimming shorts, Beijing Bikinis
30 RMB run/walk and circle
80 RMB run/walk, circle, and dinner
Lóngtóu jǐng Street Number 3
(lǎo běijīng zhá jiàng Noodle)
Use EXIT B of BeiHaiBei (Beihai North) Subway Station（Line 6)，180 degrees left U-turn heading West and keep head to north for 250 meters，you’ll find the restaurant on your left on the main square’s corner. Or just look for the damn HHH marks!
Or just look for the damn R marks!
Everyone knows the best time to visit tombs is immediately after they’ve been swept! And since it’s been ten and a half years since the Boxer Hash last visited these particular tombs, your hares figured it was about time to head east. We’re visiting our favorite Manchu emperors Qianlong, Kangxi, Ci Xi, and the whole gang out at the Eastern Qing Tombs.
Dry Hole, Molotov Cock
清東陵 Eastern Qing Tombs
Saturday, April 21st
Meet at 9:30 a.m. Departure at 10:30 a.m. sharp! No exceptions coz it’s far away yo!
150 RMB will get you a boxer trail, snacks, circle, bottomless drinks, and a bash!
You can get breakfast at XL and a Bloody Mary, so bring extra cash for brekkie and any drinks at XL Bar after the run.
What to Bring:
SPECIAL NOTE: Bring your own water bottle because the boxer isn’t gonna supply plastic water bottles any longer! We will bring a big water for you to refill.
Your cell phone. Sunscreen. Running shoes. A sense of adventure. A sense of direction. A sense of humor.
XL Bar 1-022 Shoukai Bojun Nanqu, Xindong Lu (新东路首开铂郡南区1-022).
It’s on Xindong Lu in the complex just north of Heaven and south of Lily’s American Diner. To find it, try to go to Heaven and then go the other way.
Beijing! Beijing! What wonderful place to hash…
Beijing, Beijing, what a wonderful place to hash,
We have great fun dodging the shit and trash.
Our skies are never clear,
But we have cheaper beer.
We like our drinks,
Our singing stinks.
But welcome to the Beijing Hash!