It only cums once a year, but when it cums, you better hold onto your f*cking panties — which better be red. In fact, it’s so big that Beijing has ordered a complete revamp of the country’s entire plumbing system in order to withstand this impending storm. (What, you never heard about the part of the Toilet Revolution that involves reinforcing all of Beijing’s sinks?!?).

What is it, you ask? The Beijing HHH’s annual charity red dress run? Sink & Destroy’s FOYW? Or BOTH?!?

💃💃💃💃💃

Yes, dear hashers, this year it’s a double whammy! Whether you know exactly what we’re talking about or that last paragraph made as much sense as mud, it’s time to don your sexiest red dress, dig out Grandma’s pearls, and get ready to keep from capsizing as the Beijing HHH adds some much-needed red to the Bird’s Nest and the Water Cube. Will the city’s sinks be safer once Sink & Destroy f*cks off? Who cares, but let’s test their structural integrity together one last time! Just let that sink in…

***Warning: We promise we won’t tell your boss if you cum, but we can’t promise that he or she won’t find out anyway!


Hares:

Roadkill, Supersquirter, Sink & Destroy, Blister Fister

When:

Saturday, July 7, 2018

Time:

Meet at 1:30PM, Run starts at 2PM!!!!

Type:

A-A

Hash Cash:

100 RMB run/walk and circle
150 RMB run/walk, circle, and dinner

Location:

河湖·很久前烤串坊 (HeHu HenJiu Qian)
安定路小关街甲25号 (Jia. No. 25 XiaoGuanJie)

D’erections:

Get out at Exit C of AnZhenMen Station (Line 10), walk east for 50 m, turn right and walk south for another 100 m or so. The restaurant is on your right
地铁10号线安贞门站C口旁

 

This year, the Beijing HHH is raising funds for a charity project called Gift of Life which used to support heart surgeries for poor children in China, and is now focusing on helping baby boys in Heibei who suffer from Hypospadias. So before (or while or after) you get drunk, please give some extra money to our charity.

Hypospadias is a deformation of newborn baby boys’ urinary tract and genitals. One in 300 boys in China is born with this condition. If untreated it makes boys wet their pants and causes urine trouble. They can’t marry / procreate. Because of its stigma many are abandoned by their parents, marginalized or ridiculed by society, resulting in low self-esteem and a high suicide rate.

Treatment often involves multiple and specialized surgeries between the age of 18 months to 3 years. 70% of the first surgery cost is covered by the rural co-op health plan but only 30% of the second or further surgeries is covered. Hebei Shijiazhuang Children’s Hospital dispatches pediatric urologists to rural areas to examine children with defects, educating families about seeking medical treatment and advice from experts. They also provide clinical training to rural county surgeons. Helped by the deployment of a medical screening van in villages, the number of successful treatments has been growing by 20% annually in the past years