Once a year, the fine tradition of dressing sensibly for trail is chucked into the nearest ditch, and we squeeze into our finest slutty scarlet frocks to run for a cause that’s dear to our well-lubricated hearts. That time is now — our annual Red Dress Run is cumming up, and this year we’re taking the madness to the woody fringes of Shunyi, where even Genghis Khan would’ve thought twice before invading.

Expect mud, sweat, and beers. Also, tulle, lace and chest hair — enough to make the Great Khan blush in his ger.

For those new to this debauchery-for-charity tradition: the Red Dress Run is a global Hash event, where hashers of all genders and questionable taste parade in ravishing red dresses to raise money for a good cause. BJH3 proudly supports the Heart 2 Heart Foundation, which provides life-saving heart surgeries for children in need from across China. So yes, that thigh-high number does make you look like a tart — or perhaps a Mongol warlord on laundry day — but it also makes you a goddamn hero.

The trail will have something for everyone: a challenging runner’s route for the brave, and a gloriously shiggy walker’s trail for those who prefer to stumble, strut and swish at a gentler pace. But be warned: this ain’t your dainty Chaoyang stroll – Shunyi is the ultimate wild west (well, wild north), and we’re about to pillage it in style.

After the trail, the party continues at our spiritual home, Paddy O’Shea’s, with a free-flow beer on-after. That’s right — free booze for all the hashers, because nothing goes better with cardio and cleavage than beer and bad decisions. Even Genghis knew: a night of conquest is best followed by a proper drink.

Virgins are not just welcome — they’re actively encouraged. Grab your roommate, your work crush, that random bunny from your gym who looks like she needs corrupting — just make sure they’re in red and ready to rumble like a Mongol on horseback. The more the messier.

So strap your junk down, tuck your bits up, and come out red, wet, and reckless. The Heart 2 Heart kids are counting on us — and you know a good cause makes you feel slightly better about your terrible life choices. The Red Dress Run isn’t just about drunkenness; it’s also about showing the world that when hashers put on dresses, we raise hell and money — with the fury of a thousand Khans.

So dig deep into your closet, and remember:

It’s not just a run.

It’s not just a party.

It’s the Beijing HHH Red Dress Run — lace up, drink up, and get ready for the most fabulous disaster since the fall of the Jin Dynasty.

Running hare: Silent Suck-Off, Lost in Sex

Walking Hare: BBP, I’m Pregnant

What: it’s an A-to-B hash, and is not dog-friendly as well as not kid-friendly

When: Sunday, 1 June . Meet at 2pm. Bus departs at 2:30pm

Where:  Arrow Factory Brewing箭厂啤酒

Hash cash: RMB160 (Includes bus,  patch, free flow, and h2h donation)

On after: Our hash bar: Paddy O’shea’s爱尔兰酒吧(东直门外大街店)

D’rections：

Line 17 左家庄station, then follow the map