On the whole daylong Saturday, Boxer Hash #158 proceeded with flying colours as scheduled once a month hared by Cliff Behind, ChickenShit and No Shit Sherlock in Mentougou. More than 20 hashers were exhausted by a long trail as the story goes.

Sunday Hash magnetizes around 50 hashers to ruggedize a fine time in a beautiful day. Hashing home is settled in 4 Corners bar where the jampacked hashers at start point and circle ceremony register more options for coming down to rejoice with each other. Besides, 2 remarkable hashers are leaving as FOYW. Hash rocker Blow Job hashing in Beijing for 10 years or up; Full Moon GM Sweet & Furry hashing in Beijing for 3 years. Their cohares cum musicians Blister Fister and Santorum Cocktail liven the haring up.

When the circle is staging for 20 min at a parking spot behind 4 Corners bar, a local guy professes himself the owner of the area and requires hashers to move out of his place, otherwise he’s gonna call police. Dry Hole as hasher’s deputy negotiates with him for mintues. It’s still null and void. The hashers have to relocate the circle to a square behind Drum Tower; the hashers’s gaiety naturally attracts lots of locals to crane the hashers.

Insufficient sponsored beer supplies the part of hashers. GM Super Squirter adorning with panache on her head like an Azteca chieftain hosts an oracular performance. DH and RoadKill come for circle and dinner only. 3 virgins are greeted with floppy cock. Bearded Clam is awarded a full figure-patterned T-shirt from Mismanagement for his contribution. BF lifts his stiff arm to irrigate beer with an Arm Cast. DH obtains a moose gift for his birthday. BJ gains a white T-shirt with his rocker image as FOYW’s gift. S&F acquires a blue T-shirt with her Full Moon logo as her FOYW’s gift. Taxi Ride Her’s new shoes for certain cannot escape the sharp eyes of hashers and carouses a shoe of beer with her a new shoe. Ass Tonguer swiftly switches her position to snapshot as Hash Flash. Some cannot have recognized who’s RAs and GMs due to long time no see like Melon Drama and the likes. Several latecomers by turns catch up like Creamy Lips, Wandering Tongue, Stoned Age and Roger Rabbit. RA Heart On hails out Just Elisa for her naming. Crash Test Dummy of course has authority to disclose her secret. After a simple consultation around, Terracotta Whorrior starts to vector her a new life as she’s on her knees in the circle to embrace a beer drizzle from hashers’s blessing. The last thing is RA HO leads a chorus of Swing Low to shape course of hashers. Over 20 hashers gobble Western food and guzzle Tiger beer from 4 Corners bar. The grand finale is BJ’s FOYW show with his band called Better Off Alive including hashers Just Michael, BF and Mussels from Brussels coming late to sing song with band. Surprisingly MargariCunt playing bass well. Yippee, whipping the hashers’s talent into shape. Jam session!

RA HO sparkles a hashing by blessing 4 hares to grab public attention in a hustling and bustling bar hutongs.

The trail ushers the hashers to elbow way through the thronged Nanluoguxiang. A squad of pacemakers zip past forwardly, such as ChippenDale, Six Kuai Short, ChickenShit, No Shit Sherlock, Danger Zone, Lick It To Ride, Lost in Marks & Spencer, virgin, etc. The joggers then follow orbital dynamics like Breakfast Included, Transylvestiste, Damaged Goods, Red Snatcher, Finger My Dough, Sausage Party, Pyro, Hard To Live With, Phantom and so forth. Shave Not Stirred flashes in the lineup as latecomer. 4 hashing dogs get together, Charlie cared by PreLubed, Ponyo by AT, Amy by HO, Tylor by S&F. Crossing a thriving street to a corner of Houhai for the first beer stop and looking into the distance of dimpling Houhai lake and interspersing lakescape with pleasure-boats. A bunch of walkers first hit there like Hot Cockolate, Algae Bra, Pekinsky Bikinsky, DickMocracy, Long Legs and so on. It rings a bell on an erstwhile hashing scene.

Bearing off more deep teeny-tiny and itsy-bitsy hutongs and squelching signal-to-noise ratio to windpipe thundering out extra-sensory perception. Pouring through another block of hutongs to turn right to reach the second beer stop opposite the western gate of Forbidden City. The pick-me-ups relax hashers.

Tomfoolery and poltroonery always interbreed in time of need. Suddenly thick dark clouds under the bright sun play hide-and-seek. All the way through the shades that feels cold, through the sunbelt that senses comfortable. Passing by Shishahai park’s southern gate and Beihai park’s southern gate till scuttling to south along the guarded streets, detouring back to where hashers run through. Some lost the way. The hare SC pins a location at WeChat group for the third beer stop. Once on right at a crossing, seeing the walkers over there. Shortly finding out the reason why some got lost. It’s an Oh Shit mark that was marked right on the bottom of the hare BJ. Agent Orgy and Urine Control respectively buys steamed stuffed buns to treat hashers. With tantalizing possibility of biosignature, looping back to 4 Corners bar via Erebus.

On On…

Pickle Boy
Beijing. Tuesday,
March 28, 2017