5, 4, 3, 2, 1… Lift off! Hash Red Dress “Spacecraft” takes wing yearly at length that is comprised of about 70 Hash luminaries in diverse scarlet petticoats, attracting all eyes at spaceport called the Irish Volunteer bar at 2 p,m, gearing up for superluminal journey on tangential velocity basis through Andromeda Galaxy, Cygnus, Sagittarius, Virgo Cluster, Neutron Star, Omega Centauri, Dwarf Galaxy, Triangulum Galaxy,etc., across a radius of around 14G PCs (46 billion light years) of particle horizon (the boundary of the observable universe), flying in a red-letter day.
Command Pilot: GM, Life Of Pee tops his fedora hat and dons deep blue suit, a dark tie with candy stripes yokes to the crumpled collars of white shirt to match with a garnet longskirt with a nifty pocket.
Co-Pilot: GM, Dazed and Confused in super-tight magenta dress and blows his clarion bugle for an assemble every so often.
Chief Mate: RA, Comes On Vacation in rhombus one-piece dress with many ornaments on her neck, her knee and her feet, showing a different style.
Hare Navigator: Dry Hole in purple switch and reddish chirpaur with lathework is little short of being a hot sketch; Horny On Top in bright red skirt is preoccupied with her stint; CumShot in strawberry piece collects entire Hash cashes with high priority and guides the trail for whole walkers accounting for one third of the hashers.
Behold! Pretty Woman’s teeny puppy corsets a prick blushful apron that is much more protruding for her/his tilted hip; Bjorn Again’s blonde curly peruke looks like a choice swank; Knob In Hood’s violet bouffant wig exhibits an unique; Prancing Queen’s pectoral girdle embellishes with assorted ovaloid and squarish rubies; Urine Trouble must has touched somebody else by his makeup of his smoky eyes, mellow ruddy lips, a pair of black thumbnail-sized agates dotting with his earlobes, several chains of shining pearls bedecking his neck with his natural wavy yellowish bobbed hair with one red piece; 6 Kuai Short barring extra red bowknot hairpin on his head seems like splitting image of UT; Huh, no! Bearded Clam is supposed to be a heartthrob with oily shaggy muttonchops in contrast with his black waistbelt on his gules dress, specially a pink polka dot hooped hairclip coiffuring on his new hairdo; Who’s Red Wienie with a pair of sunglasses in light red piece supports model bust still bald head and shocked face; a local anonymous man solemnly in weeny reddish hat aslant and tight flaming underdress as well as damask silk stocking and dazzling crimson high-heel leather shoes displays a transman to clang the ground as he is running; there are more than 10 Tianjin hashers who have arrived at the gathering spot earlier led by Power Puff and Comes In 5 in sequined vermeil dress; Pussy Nibble’s cheeks are splotched with two teeny-tiny red hearts each and wears a black-banded derby strawhat and holds a bubble umbrella that seems to forebode a cover; big time for men to satisfy desire of transvestism.
A constellation of fiery red hashers wedge into a residential quarter and burrow through meandering hutongs, where the hashers have been, where the onlookers must be enthralled to stare at the hashers passing by like a fervid jet stream, with laughters, screams and harangues. Some rush afront to blaze a trail with sonorous exclamation, “On On…”, e,g,. CC attiring a smack of broadway star on gules sequins all over her plug hat and one piece dress, UT, Red Snatcher in sober reddish dress and jubilant newcomers in selfsame colors; COV has lost one of her gadget; while moving to a street, the polar day is growing darker and darker. Ere long hitting the first pit stop for biofuel called the beer at retail stand on a corner of a market street. A stormy brash pours down as cracking the bottles of gelid beer. The hashers scatter to hide under roof of house, into the eatery, under a beach umbrella, good-natured owner of stand takes out more beach umbrellas for the hashers. Only two hashers will erect under a downpour to enjoy a natural shower for a while like Crash Test Dummy in bayard skirt and fresh hairstyle as well as Pickle Boy in sleeping reddish dress and afro rainbow wig; Cockarazzi carrying his professional camera turns up in a beach umbrella for clicking the moment of Hashing beauty; the gullywasher lasts 10 mins or so, better than meteor shower, solar flares and gamma ray burst, isn’t it? Perhaps we need wet-proof dress made of new materials like graphene, stronger 10 times than steel, softer 10 times than paper and more elastic 10 times than rubber. The hare shouts, “Open Chek…” in a weakening rain. The audience crowding under bungaloid overhangs along the street more and more, acclaiming, “Come on… JiaYou…”
Space-faring route brings the hashers up to a magic world with a variety of gaint bizarre statuaries such as a pack of creeping jackals and a line-up of mutated chimps, etc., as if stepping in either a Paleozoic Era of 500 million years ago or somewhat wilderness on the Mars in 500 million years later, all hashers halt at a mega-statue bearing resemblance to tyrannosaurus’s mutation or archfiend have a big family picture, alongside with a tract of well-proportioned steel structure agglomeration, Kiss My Maple Leaf in redhot flowery cheong-sam and black switch, agile Dumb Ass and newcomer dressing in identical way grope a way out in the dribbling, but have to be called back by the hare, up and up a clacking steel staircase to an elevated passageway from one high-end to another high-end, wondering if ancient people or future ones, the most of whom must be artists and scientists with smiling faces snap the photo for the hashers, a throng by a throng; this area is reputed as 798 Art Factory. When the runners file out of this place with circular polarization, converging with the walkers on second pit stop on a roadside, iced beers fill each bio-entity with talking and rejoicing, almost forgetting to move ahead sempre. They are Benz Over, Sweet and Furry, Rabbit, Karaki, Just Olesya, Who’s Your DaDa, Heart On, Ferrari, Hebei Horse Herpes, Just Sophia, Just Ellie, Just Monica, Just Cookie, May Not Come, Comes By Herself, Lost In Marks and Spencer, Breakfast Included, newcomers and so on shifting between ionizing radiation and redshift with Doppler Effect. The ultraviolet light come out overhead.
A parade of lurid Hashing magnetic field corkscrews forward, irradiating where the hashers go through on foot bridge, avenue, lanes and streets, against expectation, there is a small shop in a alleyway as a third pit stop for fueling the energy again, the most however flung away the cup at second stop, some can drink more with the bottles, some less. Nut Pirate is wild about accosting CC; Just Wendy as latecomer jumps out from nowhere with joy; To photograph each other amongst the hashers in redness is all over the place. A restroom has become where the hashers pant for crying need. At a blink, no idea as to how to rotate back to the spaceport at 5:30 p,m around. The jury is still out that Hashing speed is on the verge of a light travel at 299,792 kms/sec or beyond. While the hashers present in rapid succession, the folks at the Irish Volunteer bar greet the hashers with applause. After changing a bit clothes, without a stop, then the hashers move to a wooded area nearby for a circle glorification.
The opening remarks are delivered by GMs, LOP and D&C in turns, as per the process of Hash, over 10 newcomers accept a simple welcoming ceremony with Hash song and souvenir; 3 hares are cheered the rounds of gratitude from all hashers; 3 large plastic barrels of ice-cold beers sensitize the hashers to hit the spot and reverberant Hash songs galvanize every single charged particle in the air by 4 SongMasters such as DH, PQ, PW and COV; Jizzy Shelter’s bosom has unbuttoned more to down the droop; PB acquires a Hash opener from PW and teams up with CI5 and Just Monica to service the hashers for drinking; COV in a fluty tone hosts the most part of performance; Just Daniel with his slim body and a pair of spiked sandal has the honour of winning a Best Redshift/Best Makeup out of other nominees like BC, UT, 6KS, KMML, PW, CC, WYW,etc voted by on-site hashers; WYW has to cloak his model bust with a pale red carico as well; respected George Smith as Asia CEO of www.orbis.org and part-owner of Irish Volunteer bar as well as supporter of this Red Dress event makes address and all hashers pay tribute to him; PW comes up with reminding our role model and GM, LOP’s countdown for his leaving; for certain, other splendid parts play on till D&C howls out as an end, “Orgy! Orgy!” The appetizing sizzling pizzas receive the most of hashers at Irish Volunteer bar. Twinkle Balls pops up without a red costume, though.
Who speculates how many giga years (1 billion years) the hashers spent on this time? For a cross-reference, New Horizons Mission formerly took 162 days to tour 55,757,930 kms of a distance between the Earth and the Mars.
1 PC (parsec/parallax second)=3.26 light years=about 30.9T kms≈206,264.81 AUs (Astronomical Unit, namely, average distance between the Earth and the Sun is about 93 million miles);
1 AU≈149,597,870,700 ms;
The center of Milk Way is more than 8K PCs (2600 light years )from the Earth;
A supermassive Black Hole is about 200K PCs (650M light years) from the Earth;
Andromeda Galaxy (M31) is 780K PCs (about 2.5M light years) from the Earth;
M31 is approaching the Milk Way at about 300 kms/sec making it one of the few blueshift galaxies, could collide in 3.75~4.5 billion years.
June 10, 2014
The photon collider would convert light directly into matter by using an extremely powerful high intensity laser to fire electrons at almost the speed of light into a slab of gold. This created a beam of photons a billion times more energetic than visible light.