A magical journey through Phoenix Mountain, where the spiders are enormous, the cracks are deep, and the bushes are so sexy they would make the ’80s blush.
Prepare to leave the beaten path and discover a brand-new trail, lovingly hacked through the wilds of Phoenix Mountain by your loyal servants, the Hares.
You won’t need to bushwhack. We already did the hard work for you. Consider it our humble sacrifice.
Oulalafuckagoat and Hardcoreoutdoor disappeared for six hours. Let’s just pretend it was all bushwhacking.
Expect thick bush, enormous cracks, questionable terrain, and spiders big enough to make even the bravest Hasher reconsider their life choices.
But like the Phoenix, we shall rise from the ashes of our dignity, past decency, and good judgement.
A little goat told me that a single spider bite can give you special powers.
The Hares have already been bitten.
One grew a luxurious mane of hair.
One’s wand grew considerably bigger.
One developed a truly outrageous bush.
And one grew several inches taller.
Guess which is which.
A-TO-A TRAIL
Running trail around 10km distance for 660m elevation.
Walking trail …
Dress recommendation: Pants and long sleeves are strongly preferred. Your skin will thank you.
Runnings hares : Hardcore Outdoor and OulalaFuckagoat
Walking hares : Red Snatcher and Dr Livingstone
ON-ON!
TIME:
8:30am — Meet at Pizza Hut Dongzhimen. Bus departs at 9:00am SHARP!
9:00am — Meet at Wangjing West Exit C. Bus departs at 9:30am ALSO SHARP!
9点必胜客东直门出发，9点半望京西地铁站C口，不见不散！！
HASH CASH
200 RMB gets you…
- Trail and circle
- Round-trip bus ride
- Bottomless beer
- Special cocktails
- Snacks
- Water and other drinks
- Hash dinner
SCHEDULE
| 8:30 | Meet at Pizza Hut Dongzhimen |
| 9:00 | Bus leaves Pizza Hut Dongzhimen |
| 9:30 | Bus leaves Wangjingxi Station, Exit C |
| 11:00 | Arrive at trail, hares off, chalk talk |
| 11:30 | Running and hiking — walking trail / runners’ trail |
| 17:00 | Circle |
| 18:00 | Dinner |
| 19:00 | Back to town |
ON AFTER
Our lovely Hash Bar: Paddy O’Shea’s!
WHAT TO BRING
- Mobile phone
- Power bank
- Running or hiking shoes
- Water bottle, water pouch, or CamelBak
- Plenty of water — it’s August and there are hills!
- Sunscreen
- Breakfast / extra snacks
- Your own cup
- A sense of adventure, direction, and humour
- Optional: a small amount of enlightenment. No guarantees you’ll still have it by Circle.
REGISTRATION
We need to know the numbers, so go ahead and register.
Sign-up link: scroll down and click “Read more”
MEET-UP & BUS LOGISTICS
FIRST PICK-UP: PIZZA HUT DONGZHIMEN
Meet at 8:30am. Bus leaves at 9:00am sharp.
Pizza Hut Dongzhimen meeting point |
Dongzhimen / meeting-point map |
D’ERECTIONS
LINES 2 AND 13 — Dongzhimen subway station 澳大利亚使馆对面 (Exit C). Ten minutes walk east.
LINE 10 — Agricultural Exhibition Center subway station 农业展览馆 (Exit D2). Ten minutes walk west.
Source-page Chinese direction note: 地铁：10号线亮马桥站西北A口
SECOND PICK-UP: WANGJING WEST, EXIT C
Meet at 9:00am. Bus leaves at 9:30am sharp.
Wangjingxi Exit C 望京西 C口
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SPIDER POTTER AND THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX
ON ON!