On the horizon looms the grandest shenanigan in the land of tulips, windmills and beer – April 27th, King’s Day!

It’s not just any old royal knees-up; it’s the day Holland turns as orange as the Dutch football team, celebrating the birth of their ale-loving monarch, King Willem Alexander. The streets are filled with orange-clothed party-goers, their spirits as high as their beer levels, and there’s a cacophony of music, street raves, flea markets, and funfairs. The Dutch toast the day away along the glistening canals, their hands never far from a frothy brew, honouring the colour of the royal family, the “House of Orange”.

Now, gather around for the “Essential Guide to Swilling Ale like a True Dutchman.” Hashers, fear not! The legendary rituals of Dutch beer guzzling are written in the sacred scrolls of BJH3 – and it’s as simple as a drunken hash. Arm yourself with a few magical chants like “proost” (cheers) and “een biertje alsjeblieft” (a beer, please), and you’re halfway to being mistaken for a local. Just remember, during your ale-fueled escapades, you must try and maintain some level politeness expected by neighbours of the mother country.

There are ways to speed up the familiarisation process, including the following handy tips:

1. all beer is good, and every beer is a treasure waiting to be discovered!

In the taverns of the Low Countries, beer is served in quaint vessels called vaasjes (little vases) or fluitjes (little whistles) that hold 33 cl and 20 cl of golden nectar respectively. It is said that vaasjes or fluitjes preserve the taste of beer better than bigger glassware and keep bubbly brews like pilsner from going flat. So, harriettes, clean your vaasjes and hares, stash your fluities until you need them.

2. Adventurous sampling

It is totally normal to pair your beer with a shot of jenever, a juniper-infused elixir much loved in The Netherlands), a combo affectionately dubbed “een kopstoot” which translates to ‘a head butt’ in English.

While guzzling ale, the locals chomp on tasty bar snacks called “borrelhapjes” (little drink bites) in the mistaken belief it will prevent them from getting too drunk.

Venturing into the heart of the Netherlands, people are quickly captured by a beer culture as rich and deep as the country’s history. Here, beer is not just a drink; it’s a pillar of social life, a legacy of brewing mastery stretching back to the Middle Ages, and a vibrant testament to the Dutch spirit of innovation. This land might be small, but its beer soul is as vast as the open sea.

So, to all you courageous explorers of the amber brew, raise your vaasjes and fluitjes to the Netherlands – a pint-sized country with a barrel-sized passion for beer. Cheers to the land where every day is worthy of a toast, and every toast is a tall story in the making.

Hares: Just Johnny JYW, Just Keshan, Shtupwaffel

Type: A to B without bag drop, ask a walker to carry your bag.

When: Saturday April 27th 2024. Meet at 2.30pm, run/walk starts at 3.00 pm.

Hashcash: 30rmb for run and circle.

DINNER: Pay for yourself for dinner afterwards. This will be held at RC&C’s

Drunken Hour: THE BEER GAMES. Circle will be held inside.

Dinner place: 尚8设计+创意园 北京市朝阳区深沟村1号

Meetup: Line 1 – Yong’An Li Metrostation – Exit C South entrance

A Nation Terrorized

On April 21, 1934, the Daily Mail newspaper struck terror into the hearts of the British people when it published an awe-inspiring photograph of the Loch Ness Monster; a dinosaur-like beast that was rumored to have been lurking at the bottom a lake in Scotland called Loch Ness.

The stunningly realistic photograph sparked widespread hysteria and a surge in sightings of the creature.

Decades later, however, it was exposed as an elaborate and highly sophisticated hoax, made out of wood putty and a toy submarine purchased from F.W. Woolworth.

Ignominious Outrage

The hoax was spearheaded by a big game hunter called Marmaduke Wetherell. The year before, he had found large footprints on the side of the lake after the newspaper hired him to find the fabled beast. Upon closer inspection, however, zoologists determined that the tracks were identical, and made with an umbrella stand or ashtray that had a hippopotamus leg as a base. Publicly ridiculed and humiliated, Wetherell swore to take his revenge.

In celebration of the anniversary of this scandal, join us on Sunday as we run or walk around two bodies of water – the Tonghui River and the pond in Ritan Park – in which the fearsome beast may yet be lying in wait. With fragrant blossoms still on the trees, we can expect a glorious spring day.

In addition to Beijing’s Russian district around Yabaolu, the running trail will also take us through Shuangjing’s Bohemian Apple Community, and Chaoyangmen’s whacky Galaxy Soho.

Hares: Boxer ass ass in, Pickle Boy, Little Red Shittinghood

Type: A to A with bag drop

When: Sunday April 21st 2024. Meet at 2:30pm, run/walk starts at 3:00pm

Hashcash: 30 rmb for run and circle only, 105 rmb for run, circle and dinner afterwards.

(PLEASE NOTE: after the last beer stop, there will be no refunds and no new bookings for dinner).

Where: 

Yingmen Stir-fried Chicken, Wanhao International Apartment Shop, Yong’anli Middle Street, Chaoyang District

沂蒙炒鸡(万豪国际公寓店), 朝阳区万豪国际公寓南门南60米

D’erections: Jianguomen Subway Station, Lines 1 and 2. （建国门地铁站B东北出口）From Exit B, walk about 400m east along Jiangguomen Outer Street, turn right down Jianhua S Rd, left along Yong’an Xili, then diagonally down Yong’anli Middle St until you get to Tonghuihe N Rd. The restaurant is on the corner.