A few intrepid and cold hashers met at the Diyali restaurant near the South Gate of Chaoyang Park and despite the superb instructions provided by the co-GM, everybody still managed to get lost or was delayed by the snow. At 2pm there were just 2 runners at the restaurant… the hares. Sheep Shagger and Only Gay in the Village who as long time no sees must have wondered what the hell happened to BH3 in their absence. Would the hash be cancelled due to lack of interest?
LOTRJobs and LSW@nker turned up at 2 minutes past. Thankfully, the co-GM made a superb executive decision to delay the start of the run. 2.30pm came and went and the hares began to look decidedly nervous but the hashers began to assemble with hash stalwarts…. Piles, Dry Hole, Mastur Baker rolling in. Even Trixxie Schubba made a guest appearance having made an epic trip to Beijing airport through the snow to collect a new potential hasher, with Trixxie appearing mysteriously at the first beer stop in his Darth Vader disguise.
As we set off, we almost immediately went off-piste with the hares whining that they could honestly see their marking a few hours ago when they laid the trail. Bullsh*t! We had our first hash crash and Dry Hole fell to his knees in agony as we ran down the middle of a canal covered in a foot of snow.
The first beer stop was a welcome sight although one of our new hashers (Cara) has forgotten what the hash is about already and was busy drinking hot chocolate and dipping choccy cookies in it! Perhaps we should start thinking about a name for Cara and her squidgy cookies!
We squeezed in another beer stop and then headed home through a park. A quick hash hold was called so that we could get all the runners together to cross a lake in the park before the guards could stop us!
We returned to the restaurant and the circle was quickly called after adding several extra layers of clothing. The co-GM managed to rouse the circle with half a dozen downs downs almost losing his hand to frost bite whilst only using one glove before passing on to the acting R.A., Dry Hole. As soon as the acting R.A. had finished the outside circle was abandoned as the temperature dropped to below minus 10 degrees Celsius with a wind chill making it feel like minus 20!
On on to a spectacular spread with the hares really doing the best job ever of rebuilding hash cash after the BH3 Christmas Extravaganza!!!
A few of the more memorable down downs:
- The Hares – the snowiest trail in recent history
- Long Time No Sees – the Hares and Roger Rabbit
- Hash Virgins – Alexander
- Returnees – Petting Zoo
- Hashers who phoned the co-GM for directions or info – everyone apart from the Hares and LOTRJobs
- Latecomers – everyone apart from the hares
- Sending the co-GM a text asking whether the hash is still on and saying what a beautiful day it was. Does she realise how cold it really was?? – Cara
- Living up to his reputation and coming to the hash dressed as a giant orange condom – Only Gay in the Village
- For his intrepid mission to the airport to collect a potential new recruit to the hash. Although after running in minus 10 Celsius in snow and ice I don’t think we will see him again in a hurry!! – Trixie and Alexander
Little Sai Wanker