Most hashers heeded Circus Freak’s threats of bodily harm if they didn’t wear something PINK – even one of our virgins, Cory, found pink thread and stitched his initials onto his running jacket. With arguments over what color is actually pink vs. salmon or fuchsia we circled up for instruction.
We were amazed that with Bonnie owning so much pink that the only thing CF “wore” was a small pin-on button BUT I guess anything counts even the Reverend’s Hello Kitty blanket or Condom Popper’s legs (or the pink cock ring that he brought to the circle for down downs).
D&C jumped in excitement over the announcement about two beer stops! With everyone happy CF announced “Open Check that way”. We quickly dropped into and remained in hutongs for most of the day, some in serious need of repair. With a ton of open checks but only 10 minutes of running we were at beer stop #1. CF and Bonnie Shot handed out cups of beer and then escorted us a hundred meters down the alley to the entrance of the underground city.
Our resident teacher (one of them), Piles, asked how are you supposed to know this building is the entrance to which one of our hashers pointed to the 60 cm tall ENGLISH letters that said “Entrance to The Beijing Underground City”. Unfortunately another sign said it was permanently closed and all the pictures on exhibit seemed to have nothing to do with this monument but instead were views of snow around the city over the years.
We drained our cups and were off again. The wind was beginning to pick-up and as we followed mini dust twisters through the alleyways we wound our way to an old church. Of course once again the church was closed – on a Sunday???????
Well a drunk local stumbled off his e-bike and nearly fell down while trying to ring the doorbell. Meanwhile F T Monkey climbed up a telephone pole for a better look – the local saw this and then proceeded to make odd hip thrusting moves as he imitated FTM’s climbing style. Meanwhile we convinced the Reverend that Bonnie Shot was Dutch (that lasted for about 5 minutes until she sternly corrected him) – remember this guy is shaping our future leaders’ minds….
Beer stop two was a wind tunnel and while we debated waiting for the walkers I asked Cory how he heard about the run. He said he met some guy two years ago that was maybe an Aussie and was saying that he runs on Sundays with this group and Cory should come by. After guessing and guessing and guessing (not really) – I quickly said oh you met Phantom but did you have to wait for him to leave before you decided to show up? Still no walker’s (Pretty Woman had them wandering around with beer) we opted to keep going.
As we neared the Pearl Market CF continued to tell us what an amazing restaurant they had found. Another of our virgins, Pyromaniac, told us about building HUGE fires in Damascus for their hashing weekend trips to the desert. Soon we ran into old mark’s and had to request clarification from CF about the proper course (we all agreed that as promised there were plenty of easy to see marks).
We arrived at home and as promised the bell man offered to unload the bag car for us…still only RMB 35 per person. We grabbed beer and circled up. We greeted our 2 virgins (Cory had to leave early) and several LTNS including Cock Lobster. D&C was happy again as CL promised and delivered more space on his hosting platform for the hash site. We passed out 69 Run patches to Cock Lobster, Pretty Woman and Nobody. Nobody said she didn’t understand so CF turned the patch on its side and said the 9 is the man and the 6 is the woman – Nobody quickly turned pink if not red as she realized the significance of this award.
The Reverend punished nearly everyone, oh wait this time he actually did punish everyone with that dreaded British humor and Hello Kitty Nappy. After many songs and down downs we announced the second busy hash weekend with a Full Moon and Sunday Hash and were on food…