Live long and hash it out.

10.10 is a birthday of our moistest FM GM Agent Orgy. More than 20 hashers come together to celebrate her fete day. Downstairs her apartment building nearby Jing A bar, AO gyrates a bottle of flour to single out the first hare. As it comes to stop pointing to a virgin, per the Hash rule, she gyrates it anew for a hasher, in jiffy, it points out Pickle Boy to go for. Without hesitation, PB grabs a bottle of flour to run away after glancing around with advice from Bearded Clam. Every 10 meters on average, laying a floured mark in hustling and well-illuminated streets, on left and another on left into a dim hutong in the midst of business high-rises. On left to up a spiral flyover and further on left down to the Workers’ Stadium through the intersection of Sanlitun western street, almost at each crossing, making an Open Check mark, straight on north to reach the Heaven Supermarket.

7 minutes later, BC is the first to appear. But the HS cannot provide local beers including its new bar within touch. PB has to move forward to locate a small shop for the beer stop while some hashers have arrived. Going northward and on right to the end of a lane to sniff out a whistle-stop shop for the first break. In a twinkling, the most hashers catch up with it. AO routes a pin at the WeChat group. Heart On takes care of Amy and Baijiu. Ass Tonguer rouged her lips. Principal Penetration, Rambo No.5, Just Steven, Just Anna and the others ramble about. Just Claire does not drink. Drinks Like a Girl clicks photos. Some trickle in like Just Toni and a virgin riding a shared bikes, latecomer Shaven Not Stirred, Danger Zone and Hot Cockolate get lost and pinpoint it from the pin on the WeChat. Imperceptibly Dry Hole has early sneaked off to mark the second haring. AO scans the bar code to pay the beer.

A shout for a marked trail steers the hashers into a poky and dark alleyway and out of it, a murky slurry construction site confuses the hashers a bit. Scrooping through with pit-a-pat as if bumping up a kinda psi . On left to Sanlitun, the erstwhile thriving night piece has been replaced by the construction site in a mess. Down to the another street to encounter an Open Check sign that splits the hashers and the trail brings the hashers to north on the crowded street, on left into an alleyway to the end for the second beer stop. Beating the living daylights out of Sanlitun night. Good riddance! Chewing the fat with cold beer lasts 10 minutes. AO brooms to finish the homestretch. Many hashers are too familiar with this area. On right to head to the road to angle cross into a darkish hutong, on left to forage the easy marks and on right to see the end point. The whole trail draws a full circle. Just Dumb and Bruised Lee who backpack from their holiday are just along from the airport.

The festivity is ensconced alongside of Jing A taproom. The scene fills with ebullience. FM RA Lick It To Ride wearing his long fluffy wolf hat leads a pray for lager as usual. GM AO calls the shots for a bunch of virgins and presents a quality opener apiece. These 3 hares are hailed out several times and the Hash songs inculcate the good points into the repertoire of these 3 hares. All and sundry hoist steins and bottles to acclaim AO’s birthday and another 2 hashers’ lead-up such as Just Toni and HO. The Happy Birthday song geminate this very moment. AO then snatches up a bottle of vodka to pass the hashers to drink, later on, BC pop-opens a Jimmy the hamster to pass the hashers to drink. The Hash dithyrambs DH precents resound across the heaven. All of a sudden, Algae Bra, Tit for Tap and a virgin bob up for latecomers. A local young couple pass by and ask how they can join the Hash. By convention, the hashers ought to howl over a moon, albeit air freshening, the moon is blocked by somewhat establishments. The unique AO as FM GM rushes up a high sidestep to show her glary buttocks for a moon howl of the hashers (it illustrates that the moon controls woman physiological cycle). 24 bottles of beer have changed 23 old soldiers. The most then walk to the Cannon’s Hamburger for a Hash dinner. Mind the Gap hurries to make it as latest comer. It’s nisi for some hashers to celebrate more.

On On…

Pickle Boy
Beijing. Thursday,
October 12, 2017